There’s a lot of reasons to go to the gym: to get that beach bod, keep yourself healthy, and getting hand-jobs in the showers. Well, that’s one way to give your wrists a good workout. Unfortunately, that’s not our gym, (we’d look like Arnold Schwarzenegger if it was), but rather the Virgin Active in Barbican.

In fact, cruising has become so popular in the showers, that members have a nickname for it: the wank tank. And furthermore, Virgin Active has issued emails to their members addressing the problem.

“We are aware that there have been reports of incidents linked to inappropriate behaviour, specific to the male locker room facilities,” the email read. It went on to say that they take matters “extremely seriously” and were bringing in the City of London police to “address and investigate” anybody getting frisky.

“Going forward please be advised that undercover police officers will be present in the male locker room and they will take any appropriate action should the need arise”.

“We would like to assure our members that your safeguarding is paramount to us…”

Clearly, VA members were not impressed that the feds were gonna be taking legal action over a vigorous soap down, as the chain then sent out a follow-up email to casually contradict everything they’d just said:

“Following on from our message on the 5th of August we are pleased to report that no further incidents of inappropriate behaviour have been reported. However, we would like to clarify a few points from the previous correspondence”.

“We work very closely with the City of London Police to report and deal with any incidents that arise in and around our premises, but no undercover police have been present inside our changing facilities at the gym”.

GURL, didn’t you just say… Sounds like a scare tac-tic if you ask us; but if you’re gonna tart up your showers like a slutty bathhouse, what y’all expect?