Neil Patrick Harris

Four months after tying the knot, Neil Patrick and his husband David seem happy as ever slathering each other with PDA in Hawaii. Normally we throw things at people that get it on in public, but these two are just so happy! Thank God that “comedy” show How I Met Your Mother has finished though, Neil has much more talent than some womaniser with predictable one-liners. His stint on American Horror Story is already showcasing his capabilities. He’ll be hosting the Oscars next month, and has been chilling with Elton John and David Furnish. Now they gotta be some extravagant dinner parties girl!

Spencer Matthews

Made In Chelsea star also took to the beach this week with his current squeeze Lauren something. The pair were at a boot camp in Ibiza. He’s managed to keep his physique in good shape, but that’s the problem with doing a Men’s Fitness intense body build – it’s unrealistic to sustain. Heard that chick was doing some legendary boasting on her social media about meeting A-Listers over there. There ain’t nothing wrong with being fame hungry, but at least do it off your own back, not some reality TV star.

Justin Bieber

Totally shocked that Justin Bieber is STILL talking about the accusations of his pictures for Calvin Klein being photoshopped. Any normal star would laugh, dust of their shoulders, and Tweet something sassy from their private jet. Justin Bieber has to sue people, get his trainer to confirm he hasn’t got a micro-dick and now post completely unnecessary body snaps. YAWN. Nobody gives a fuck mate. The way he’s rehashing this crap like somebody insulted his mother. Move on, girl. That’s old news, we’re all much more interested in Kris Jenner photoshopped to look like a trans:

My God, In Touch is the biggest pile of shit to hit the shelves since 50 Shades of Wank.