They say that smoking weed fucks up your productivity, they’re right. It does. This is my first post in 10 days. I was busy with uni, a little disheartened, demotivated, uninspired, not having any sex – but I was also so stoned that I was spending more time playing with Puss than I was doing my blog.

Puss, for those of you that don’t know is the hilarious – and I mean piss-your-pants-after-four-spliffs-HILARIOUS – little sticker that has been introduced to the world of Facebook Chat via iPhone. His real name is Pusheen, be we call him Puss. There’s only a limited number of stickers on the Facebook App but even just by googling him, there are hours of endless fun. Especially if you smoke. Coming up with story lines about Puss’s day-to-day life has actually made getting baked that much more fun.

1. Puss is a blatant fag 

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2. Puss is also a part-time tranny

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3. Puss is a stoner

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4. Puss feels the pressures of the gay community

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5. Puss does impressions
Seen here doing an impression of the famously annoying Bruno Mars. We prefer Puss so much more.

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6. Puss is independent 

Everyone knows Melissa Joan Hart, despite being supported by gays throughout her entire career as Sabrina the Teenage With is a homophobic hillbilly. So Puss ditched her and rides the broom alone.

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7. Puss does porn

Appearing frequently on the feline version of Cam4, Cat4.

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8. Puss is smart

Actually he has a degree in licking himself inappropriately and cat fights.

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9. Puss gets revenge

Basically Puss is having a feud with Grumpy Cat.

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10. Even Puss knows BlackBerry’s are shit

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11. Puss is a massage-escort

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12. Puss has a secret life as a phone-sex girl

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13. Puss drops pills

Those pupils say it all…

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14. Puss gets buzzing at chill outs, puts on whatever clothes she can find and then shits herself.  

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15. Puss supports Cocktails and Cocktalk

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Goodbye Grumpy Cat! Puss is so much fiercer.